Assalamualaikum and hi!
I thought I have a lot of posts this month but I was wrong. This is the fourth one this month, might be the last one for 2017. I want to rewind my 2017 but I think I will just make it as simple as I can. I can say, a lot of things happened this year, and I am proud of myself, even it is not that much, but I am grateful to God.
I am 25 this year. 6 years ago, I went to Indonesia to continue my studies. I was young when I left Malaysia. I've spent 6 years in someone else country. I do feel sad, I feel like I've lost myself. I've changed completely. And when I came back this year, I'm feeling 19. I want to do things that I've missed. But... people I used to be with aren't at the same page like me. We are not at the same page anymore. It's sad, I know. But, this is life.
This 2017, I have struggle a lot. I need to go through a rough department as my last posting. I never thought that I could pass that department. And then, I have to repeat my ophthalmology department before taking a national board exam, which is a competency exam for Indonesian doctors. I was in denial at first, why I need to take that exam because I am not working in Indonesia but then I realized, I learn a lot throughout the process. I went to Bandung to take some classes for that exam, doing some preparation in Bandung was great. My busy life starts from February 2017 to May 2017, my hard work paids off when I see my exam result. I passed my exam, I did it. I never thought I could since I always have low self-confidence. I was so happy. Of course I deserve to be happy because I work really hard to pass the exam, one shot. It's not easy.
After eid fitr, I start busy with my convo preparation. I have to prepare a lot of things, financially, documentally(?) lol. A lot of things needed to register in and out from the uni. I spent the rest of the month with my friends, packing my stuffs to send back to Malaysia and lots more. Of course, that time I keep reminiscing the old days when I was still a medical student and now I am graduating lol . And of course, my heart ache a little since I have to leave my friends. Those people who were with me during my studies, people who were there to give support, people who I meet everyday. I have to say, waiting is painful, leaving is painful too.
On my oath-taking ceremony day, I was nervous. I am doing that oath thing guys, it's like, I need to be much much much super duper much more responsible towards myself, and others too. Yes, it sounds scary af. I'm finally a doctor, that's really something. I am never into medical line, I never thought I could finish my medschool because when I was a high school student, people always say, it's a tough course. It's a very tough course. It is, especially in clinical year, where you can't really sleep properly because you need to monitor your patients. Whatever it is, I'm done with this hahahaha HO might have the same pattern I guess, omg.
I left Indonesia in September, started my holiday trip with my parents and friends. I went to Vietnam with my family and then Penang and Malacca trip with my friends. I've spent a lot hahahaha and wasting my time too. It's weird to wake up in my room, to spend my days in my house. I am not used to it. It is awkward af. Then I start to register for my placement and I am still waiting. September, October , November and December, I spent all these months with my trips, oversleeps, Super Junior's comeback, Korean dramas, Korean variety shows and many more. Basically, I am always by myself. Because everyone is busy with their work, some busy with their commitments and so many more. I did spent my time with my friends when they are free. Oh yeah, I'm busy with my doctor appointment, too. Yes, apparently I am a patient lol
This month, I received a sad news and a good news too. My friend passed her exam, like finally she's coming back for good. And the bad news is, Jonghyun left us. And now I am busy with my driving class. Yes. I really hope I could do well. And finally I managed to get my HPV vaccine lol
January 2018 is approaching, less than 48 hours. I think I did very well this year. But still, I feel like I did nothing. Maybe because everyone is moving to the next chapter of their life but I am not. My friends in Indonesia have start working as a doctor, some are married, and some are getting married. They are going into a "new world". You get what I mean? And I am still the same, I just want to be 19 years old again, and do things I want in Malaysia with my fam and friends. But I know very well, we can't turn back the time, right? Huhu.
Before 2018, I just want to share some songs. I will walk into 2018 with these songs. I hope you guys enjoy reading my blog. And enjoying these songs, too. No 'new year new me', just enjoy your 2018! May everything you wish for next year comes true. Happy 2018.
Teruskan membaca blog gua walaupun gua dah jadi dokter.
Han.
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